Can we all just take a minute to appreciate the fact that John Flansburgh is jumping/spinning/running around on the stage for THIS ENTIRE VIDEO
Things John Sidney Linnell does that are really really cute:
1. Drinking his coffee
2. Rolling his eyes
So I don’t know about anyone else, but I wasn’t aware we had the full performance of this and I’M KIND OF REALLY EXCITED. On the old Video Bootlegs VHS tapes it’s cut off, starting in the middle of the first verse, and I thought I remembered it being the same way with the version on the Gigantic DVD, so I thought the full thing was just lost to the sands of time. BUT HERE IT IS. EXCITING.
I love this performance, so much. I was too young for this incarnation of The Tonight Show so the significance of the band is lost on me, but they sound great, and my favourite part is how The Johns (especially Linnell) are clearly completely overwhelmed with excitement.
The wonderful way he dances :3
[repeat comments from earlier post about lipsyncing WTF and SPAZZIN’ and HAAAAAAAAAAAAIR and THOSE GODDAMN JEANS]
[add comment about CHUCKS CHUCKS CHUCKS]
VIDEO RAISES NEW AND TROUBLING QUESTIONS:
1. Why the fuck do British music shows make the bands lipsync? I mean obviously songs are enhanced by WATCHING THE SINGER BE A HUGE DORK while you listen to them, but it’s still weird.
2. HOW IS JOHN HOT ENOUGH THAT I WAS SO DISTRACTED BY HIM THAT IT TOOK ME SEVERAL SECONDS TO EVEN REALIZE IT WAS THE ALBUM VERSION, ESPECIALLY WHEN HE DOESN’T EVEN HAVE AN INSTRUMENT TO PLAY THE SONG ON?
3. Is that Ramones t-shirt the only thing Fans owned in 1990? HE WORE IT CONSTANTLY.
4. Is it weird to watch something and be simultaneously CRACKING UP and REALLY TURNED ON? I guess that probably sounds weird. But sometimes it’s basically THE ONLY APPROPRIATE RESPONSE to John Linnell.
5. If we started a petition saying that when they do shows John should play accordion for half of the songs and then play nothing for half the songs so he can SPAZ THE FUCK OUT, would they do it? PLEASE?
6. HOW IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A HUMAN BEING’S HAIR TO BE THAT GOOD?
7. How can Flans still appear to be rocking so hard when it’s fake? IT’S IMPRESSIVE.
8. Does John realize how spazzy he is? Does he realize how FUCKING ADORABLE it is when he’s spazzy? Is he spazzy because he’s nervous? WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIM?
9. THOSE TIGHT BLACK JEANS JOHN USED TO WEAR. FUCK. FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK. Um ok that isn’t a question actually. But FUCK. FUCK.
Have you noticed how like all of John’s really sweet songs are about non-human things? The angel in “She’s an Angel” is humanish but not technically human, and then the two other most outstanding examples I can think of off the top of my head are “Birdhouse in Your Soul” and “Hovering Sombrero.” Perhaps it’s because he’s not human himself.
Wait so like, in Birdhouse, what exactly is his “secret to tell”? Is it just “My name is blue canary, one note spelled L-I-T-E”? Like, “I can’t believe I’m telling you this, BUT I’M A NIGHTLIGHT THAT’S SHAPED LIKE A BLUE CANARY!” Pretty sure anyone looking at you would be able to tell that, NightlightJohn. No big confession necessary.
Yeh so last night I watched Direct from Brooklyn all in one sitting and basically MY BRAIN MELTED AND IS STILL MELTED AND I HAVE NO IDEA HOW I’M EVEN MANAGING TO TYPE THIS RIGHT NOW.
You might expect that I watch it all the time, but actually, I watch the whole thing very rarely. I watch the individual videos all the time, but the whole thing all at once is TOO MUCH TO HANDLE. Even one three-minute chunk of John being THAT INSANELY SEXY is practically too much to handle.
But last night I got brave and watched the whole thing. My excuse was that I hadn’t watched it with the commentary track in, god, years and years (for some reason???). But also I was considering it a little challenge to myself, to see if I could handle it.
And, well, it was a resounding failure. I had to take a 15-minute break after “Birdhouse in Your Soul” just to recover a little. It was like all the videos up to that point (and all the ones after) he’s already at THE ABSOLUTE MAXIMUM LEVEL OF HOTNESS but then in Birdhouse he just breaks the measuring tool entirely. Jesus CHRIST. Watching Birdhouse by itself is already incredibly intense for me, but watching it in the context of all that other stuff was just, yeh, too much.
As far as the commentary track goes, yeh, it was interesting and fun. My two personal highlights:
#2: When John says, in complete seriousness, that they were attempting to make the “They’ll Need a Crane” video “glamorous” RIGHT AT THE MOMENT WHEN HE’S DOING THE SPAZZIEST DORKIEST ADORABLEST DANCE EVER IN THE HISTORY OF TIME.
#1: WHEN JOHN SAYS “SHOT OUR WAD,” WHICH I HAD SOMEHOW FORGOTTEN ABOUT. CAN SOMEONE EXPLAIN TO ME HOW I FORGOT ABOUT THIS? BECAUSE IT MAKES EXACTLY ZERO SENSE. Jesus CHRIST. JOHN. You’re KILLING me over here. STOP IT. TOO MUCH.